(Sigh) Our exes. Can’t live with them and our story is quite bland without them. Long after they’re gone we still feel the need to impress them. Still feel the need to make sure THEY somehow know we are doing even BETTER without them! Why is that?!
(Exhale) Maybe it all has to do with HOW it ended. You know. If it was a pleasant, soft hearted, genuine and mutual parting of the ways. The kind of break up where even the term “break up” just sounds so harsh. You can’t help but still have hope. The letter you leave in their mailbox may read:
Remember I used to call you that all the time? You would blush and turn your head as though you were shy. You were anything but. I loved speaking to the Mighty Warrior in you. Hearing your ROAR. Falling in love with the potential you had and honored by your willingness to allow me to call it forth. I loved how you asked if your dimple could have a word with my mole. I miss you, still love you and still want you.
(Breathe) Oh but if it was rough, tumultuous, rocky and left a horrible taste in your mouth? The letter you leave on their windshield you just cracked may read:
Hey Limp Biscuit!
If you ever come to my house again I will not only call the cops I will call your minimum wage job and tell them I did. The last two years of my life were a complete utter waste of my time! I hated the shape of your head, that dead front tooth and your obnoxious laugh. I even hated your raggedy apartment. The strongest thing in it wasn’t even you. It was that weak behind coffee you used to make and the odor emanating from your feet! Don’t just lose my number, delete every memory we’ve ever shared. Those files were corrupted because of you BEING a virus.
(Reflect) Why do we even care?! They are our exes for a reason! How is it that we feel we have to impress them, in order to get them and still want to impress them after they’re gone? No matter why they’re gone. I’ve even heard it said, “Never let your ex see you doing or looking bad!” Are we so riddled with rejection and insecurity that we can’t function without being endorsed by the one who’s moved on, the one who got away or even the loser we got rid of?
We post subliminal comments on Social Media hoping they’ll read it and flawless photos of ourselves hoping they’ll “like” them! Not even realizing that they have muted you on Twitter and hidden your updates from their timeline on Facebook. That’s IF they haven’t blocked you. Posting encrypted messages referring to inside jokes and better days gone by.
And we text. Knowing they got it and HOPING to see these little dots!
Even if we were the one that um (clears throat) lost it…
Talk to me! I would love to hear your thoughts! Feel free to share as usual. Remember this is a shade free/no judgment zone! Ahhh this should fun and interesting…
© Ericka Arthur and authenticitee, 2015
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Photo Credits: 1,2- Unknown 3-Quick Meme 4- My Tumbling Thoughts 5-Ericka Arthur 6-Unknown