December 30, 2019

This morning, I sat in the 8th funeral/homegoing I’ve attended this year. Woulda been the 10th if I could’ve gotten the time off from work to pay my respects to the others.

Two suicides; the youngest of which was 10 yrs old, one murder, and 4 of the deaths having made the news. And that’s just my story. One iota of it actually. There’s no doubt in my mind you have your own.

This morning, I sat in the 8th funeral/homegoing I’ve attended this year. My pen listened to the gut wrenching pain around me. Sobs and faint smiles of sweet recollection of the 32 yr old laid to rest, kissed the air. My mind fought vehemently with time as I listened to his aunt read a poem she wrote entitled “We’ve Got To Stop Meeting Like This”.

She was so right. Why do we do that? I’m not sure why we do that. You know…that. Like we have forever.

So if I reach for you. If I hug you from my core. If I tell you, “I love you” or “I miss you” or that I’m happy to see you, its intentional. I am intentional about my love and the way that I love. So very intentional…and there are a myriad of reasons why.

For me, Peter is one of my many reasons why. Supervisor turned family friend who years later even sang at my wedding; I couldn’t wait to see him when we relocated back to the East Coast 2 years ago. Even though we had kept in touch I decided to surprise him with the kids. He had no idea we had moved back.

I had it all planned out. I called him two weeks after we got settled but instead his cousin answered because she recognized my name. She had just came from his funeral.

Yeah.

So if I love on you, thank you, honor you, look into your eyes and tell I miss you, hit you up out the clear blue, let you know I’m happy to see you…every time I see you – allow me.

‘Cause this morning, I sat in the 8th funeral/homegoing I’ve attended this year…💫e

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