by on

Shynon Barnayha​

I am a mother of 3 children; 2 boys and a daughter. In 2007 I was diagnosed with epilepsy. I never wanted to believe it. I was trying to figure out how this happened. I had never had a seizure as a child. My family doesn’t have any signs of having seizures. I called my heart out and I remember looking at my kids thinking I’m going to die before they are even grown up. I was depressed and a million thoughts were running in my head. I was trying to reflect “Why me and how?”

Then I remembered my ex-husband (kid’s dad). He and I were always fighting. He was very abusive; verbally, emotionally, physically; an alcoholic and on drugs. When I had my major first seizure, it was on my birthday. I remember riding in an ambulance dripping in blood and my face burning. When I was able to check my face, I looked in the mirror once I had arrived to the hospital. It was burnt up on one side of my face from scraping against the carpet, blood everywhere, couches, puddles of blood on the floor. It had taken me 3-6 months to heal from all the injuries. I knew my face and my life would never be the same again. I couldn’t help but feel ugly and useless. My kids wouldn’t see me raise them.

Living with epilepsy has only made me get stronger and gain strength. I had learned to stop feeling sorry for the mistakes I had made when it came to my past. I had to learn how to concentrate on my future. I hated feeling like I wasn’t going to accomplish what I wanted to do within my life. All I had pictured my whole life was having a strong family, actually getting married to someone that will NOT abuse me or my children. I wanted to live in peace and happiness.

I have to thank my family and friends who have supported me in making sure that I don’t let this get me down and that I still grow as a person; by telling me that I will always have their support. To my kids Pharrel, Asiah and Jarell, they had supported me through thick and thin. They had seen me have epileptic seizures and they took care of me. I love my children for that. I thank God every day that I am still alive.

 

Contact Information:

Email: barnayhashynon1984@gmail.com

 

*November is Epilepsy Awareness Month. For more information visit: http://www.epilepsy.com/make-difference/get-involved/national-epilepsy-awareness-month

**October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. For 24/7 help & more information visit: http://www.thehotline.org/

© Ericka Arthur and authenticitee speaks, 2015, 2016 Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Ericka Arthur and authenticitee speaks with appropriate and specific direction to the original content

Blog | http://www.authenticiteespeaks.com

IG | @authenticiteespeaks

Twitter | @authenticitee

Remember YOU MATTER!

Photo Credit: Shynon Barnayha. No copyright infringement intended.

by on

  
Dear Beloved,

How are you. No. Really. How are you? I’m writing because you told me not to call the house anymore. That it wasn’t safe. And this random P.O. Box that you’re using in an unfamiliar zip code, says more than any word you’ve not spoken. Word on the street is “love shouldn’t hurt” but I’m not sure you heard. 

When the bruises faded, the wounds were still visible. How you flinched when certain color cars drove past us on the way to lunch. I saw what you didn’t want me to see and noticed what you covered. 

I give you more than that broken wrist could ever hold, even when it’s made whole. I give you prayers of love and light. Prayers of love gone right. Prayers of love without fright. Prayers of a love that doesn’t hurt tonight.

Here when you’re ready,

💞e

  

© Ericka Arthur and authenticitee, 2015 Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Ericka Arthur and authenticitee with appropriate and specific direction to the original content

Photo Credit: No copyright infringement intended. http://www.bristol.ac.uk/news/2008/6029.html